LIVING WITH DEMENTIA
To live with dementia is an experience that not too many people will relate to. The following is a section from the "introduction to dementia" on the NHS Choices Site.
Dementia describes the effects of certain conditions and diseases on a person’s mental ability, personality and behaviour. People with dementia commonly experience problems with memory and the skills needed to carry out everyday activities. There are many different causes of dementia but Alzheimer’s disease is the most common cause. Dementia is not a normal part of ageing.
About 500,000 people in England have dementia and although it can occur at any age, it's more common in older people. About one in 20 people over 65 has dementia.
Dementia usually gets worse slowly, often over many years, and may mean that the person affected can no longer live independently. This affects both people who develop dementia and the people who care for them. It can shorten people’s lives and is an important cause of disability.
There are currently no treatments that can cure or stop the progression of most forms of dementia. However, drugs and other treatments can improve symptoms in some people, and you and your family can get the help and support you need to live with dementia.
Dementia describes the effects of certain conditions and diseases on a person’s mental ability, personality and behaviour. People with dementia commonly experience problems with memory and the skills needed to carry out everyday activities. There are many different causes of dementia but Alzheimer’s disease is the most common cause. Dementia is not a normal part of ageing.
About 500,000 people in England have dementia and although it can occur at any age, it's more common in older people. About one in 20 people over 65 has dementia.
Dementia usually gets worse slowly, often over many years, and may mean that the person affected can no longer live independently. This affects both people who develop dementia and the people who care for them. It can shorten people’s lives and is an important cause of disability.
There are currently no treatments that can cure or stop the progression of most forms of dementia. However, drugs and other treatments can improve symptoms in some people, and you and your family can get the help and support you need to live with dementia.
THE CARER'S VIEW?
To be a part of the life of a person with dementia is to be part of a life changing responsibility. There can be no easy way to say this but the strain on the family, after a period, can be dramatic.
The person you once knew, with strong views and definite moralities has "suddenly" become another person, who has few concerns about dignity or the words used to express themselves.
The diagnostic advice you receive from the medical professionals is honest and of concern for the future requirements, "are you sure you know what you are getting into?" "in three years you will see a marked deterioration in their condition and abilities". Of course, you do not have a clue what the "responsibilities" will become. How can you know? yet the immediate drive to provide the family support is of greater value and belief. Your intention is to support the person for all your worth, of course you will cope.
Well, I can tell you that, depending on the type of dementia, your future commitments and daily activities will be totally remodelled.
There are days when the immediate Carer will be driven to despair and semi-violent outbursts, the life worth will be tested to braking and the other family members will be catapulted into the turmoil and strain. To provide an undiscriminating view of the situation is a vague memory in the bowels of your lowest brain cells. You cannot help but be drawn into the turmoil of practical and suitable care and the personal and improper pathway of a family member.
Being "cruel to be kind" is a valid saying and should be strove for. That is not to be physically damaging of the person with dementia, or mentally cruel about their inabilities but to be aware of the dietary realities and mental stimuli that this person should be encouraged to maintain. Without this commitment the person will gradually but definitely slip into an aggressive and demanding state, with little understanding of their affect on the family or the sleeping needs of the family.
I am witnessing a deterioration of the person I once knew and the gradual destruction of the father-in-law who once was more active than I.
Obviously, there are different circumstances and requirements to each individual situation but I would ask of you all, to think long and hard about the plans you might have and the future of the relative/friend who suffers.
Check out all the sites you can and form a clear opinion of YOUR expectations and be REALISTIC with your family.
The caring of a person with dementia, in the early stages, is fairly comfortable to deal with and(if you have the time) provide suitable care. As the dementia takes a more extensive hold on the person your commitment will be tested and time becomes blurred. Carers can suffer depression, anxiety, sleep deprivation, guilt and much much more, so provide the care you can and be prepared to hand over the care to the professionals once the intensity of care becomes unrealistic.
Look at http://www.nhs.uk/pathways/dementia/ for help.
DON'T BE ALONE, SPEAK TO SOMEONE AND GET THE BURDEN OFF YOUR SHOULDERS, WITHOUT THIS RELEASE YOU WILL BETRAY YOUR OWN NEEDS.
"grandadknows" is always a point of contact and a place of sanctuary for your mind. Please use us to aid your valuable efforts.
To care for, or about, someone you first have to care about yourself. False love cheats everyone.
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